EVERYTHING YOU’VE EVER WANTED TO KNOW BUT WERE AFRAID TO ASK
Hello everyone and Welcome to another FACTUAL FRIDAY. It’s March, which means it’s COLON CANCER AWARENESS MONTH. And, when we talk about Colon Cancer, we have to talk about the COLONOSCOPY.
To begin, COLON CANCER – also referred to as COLORECTAL CANCER – is the third most common cancer in the United States. Typically, it strikes individuals at the average age of sixty, with men having one chance in twenty-two of developing it and women having one chance in twenty-four.
But, the great news about colon cancer is that it’s nearly one hundred percent preventable! And, we have the colonoscopy to thank for that.
As most of you know, my first cancer was colon cancer. It occurred many years ago when I was deemed “too young to have cancer.” I was a thin, athletic, non-smoking vegetarian when I was diagnosed at half the average age of the typical patient. I found out later, however, that colon cancer ran in my family – and heredity is a major risk factor for this cancer.
But, even so, I might have been able to prevent my cancer IF I had known about my family medical history and IF I had undergone the all important colonoscopy at a younger age.
And, as the most likely World Record holder for the number of colonoscopies undergone in a twenty-year period, I’m happy to share with you my experience and hopefully, answer some of your questions.
The first thing we should understand is that the procedure itself is nothing. Easy Breezy. It’s the preparation that presents the challenge. So, let’s set our clocks to twenty-four hours before your scheduled procedure and take it from there!
THE PREPARATION
The prep begins the day before your procedure with a twenty-four hour fast starting in the morning and consisting of clear liquids only. Then, between 2:00 PM and 6:00 PM of your fasting day, you begin taking a powerful laxative that will completely flush the intestinal tract.
Years ago, the most recommended laxative was a solution known as Go-Litely. And, of course, I’m sure the irony of this name is not lost on anyone. We had to drink half a gallon of this foul-tasting liquid over several hours to “produce” the required results.
In the alternative, some of us preferred to drink an ounce and a half of soda phosphate or to take several Visicol tablets with plenty or water. Now, these two methods were easier on the stomach but, unfortunately, were hard on the kidneys. So, in the United States at least, both were discontinued by their respective manufacturers.
I’m happy to report, however, that today we have a few viable alternatives for this cleansing process that are surprisingly user-friendly.
The first is a recipe used by the Sloan Kettering Cancer Center. It’s an easy over-the-counter solution that mixes good old-fashioned Gatorade and Miralax, creating a tasty drink for the perfect purge.
The second is a solution called Prepopik. You drink five ounces of this liquid the day before your procedure with plenty of clear liquids (and no, this does not include Chardonnay) and follow this up with another five ounces the morning of your procedure. It requires a doctor’s prescription, but it’s lemony-lime flavor makes it my personal choice.
Whichever cleansing option you choose, however, know that the result will be the same. I always say, “Have the running shoes on and be prepared to move quickly!”
In addition, make sure there’s plenty of toilet tissue or baby wipes in the bathroom. A little petroleum jelly also is a good thing to have on hand. This will help prevent chafing of our sensitive bums throughout the cleansing process.
THE PROCEDURE
Now that we have that behind us 😊 — the rest is easy!
On procedure day you will need a ride to and from the clinic or medical center. You’ll arrive, fill out a few forms and then walk to a cubicle replete with a hospital bed and garments to wear.
Often, these garments often come with verbal instructions from the nurse like, “Gown opens to the back, hat goes on the head and socks go on the feet.” And, honestly, these instructions are probably necessary. I’m sure some of us are so nervous we’d probably end up putting the socks on our heads and the hat on our feet if we weren’t told otherwise. So, I get it. No smirks from me.
Now, once you’re cozy in bed (it really is cozy because they bring warm blankets) the nurse hooks up the IV and both the anesthesiologist and your doctor come by to say, “Hi!” After everyone exchanges greetings you’re wheeled into the examination room, you’ll start to say something — and the next thing you know is that the same nurse you met earlier is now whispering in your ear, “It’s time to wake up.”
That’s it. One and done. And, you really can wake right up because the procedure only requires a “twilight” anesthesia, not a general.
So, now it’s time to get dressed! And, to partake in the yummy fruit juice the same nurse now brings you to begin the re-hydration process. This also is the time your doctor will return to discuss the findings of your colonoscopy.
My doctor, for instance, takes great pleasure in telling me that I’m a “perfect asshole.” Music to my ears, of course, as he has been my doctor for many years and previous findings — from my first colonoscopy to be exact — were not so welcome.
THE TECHNOLOGY
So, here’s the really great thing about a colonoscopy. It utilizes a flexible, tiny tube known as an endoscope that emits a puff of air as it travels through the intestinal tract, which expands the sides of the colon and allows the endoscope to move forward.
The tip of the endoscope also contains a computer chip that videotapes the intestinal walls as it moves through the colon. This video (which will never make it to YouTube) is then transmitted to a monitor in the examination room where your physician can observe the procedure as it’s conducted.
In addition, the endoscope has a little electrical loop that can cut and cauterize any intestinal anomaly that appears on the monitor, like a colon polyp. Known as a polypectomy, this removal of any suspicious or pre-cancerous tissue during the colonoscopy can actually prevent colon cancer from developing in the first place!
And, to top it all off, this specialized little scope also comes equipped with a little vacuum cleaner that helps provide better viewing by “cleaning up” any residual material not purged through the preparation process. Boy! Do they think of everything or what?!
Now remember, most of us only need to undergo a colonoscopy once every five or so years with most having their first around the age of fifty. But, for those of us with a higher than average risk for colon cancer – myself included — the testing will be more frequent and will probably begin at an earlier age.
MARCH is COLON CANCER AWARENESS MONTH. So, please do yourself a favor and talk to your physician. Determine your personal risks for colon cancer. And, then take all the proper PRO-ACTIVE steps necessary to protect your health and wellbeing!
Thanks again for joining me everyone! Until next time, stay in GOOD HEALTH and . . .
TAKE THE COURSE AND TAKE CHARGE!
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